i was only at 39 weeks and 5 days, but i was so ready to have this baby. not because the pregnancy was hard- it was actually fairly easy!- but because i couldn't wait to expand our family and meet the new precious spirit. i had been dilating for the past two weeks and i was hopeful that this appointment would show enough change i could just head over to delivery. i had been feeling some contractions throughout the week. well, i was dilated more- about a 3.5- and i was 50% effaced so things were on their way, but not quite labor and delivery status yet. just as i was feeling a little disappointed and rounding up as much patience as i could to keep waiting, dr. cox said, "so should we schedule for a week from now, or do we want to talk induction?" immediately i knew that i wasn't opposed to being induced. that's how i went with zenna, and my control-freak brain just feels a lot more comfortable having a concrete plan in place vs. waiting for delivery to spontaneously begin whenever. so i told him we could talk induction. then i mentioned the following weekend would be bad timing because my parents were going out of town for cole's jr. rodeo, so he said, "will tomorrow be soon enough?" tomorrow?! one day BEFORE my due date? he had to be kidding! i literally thought he was joking, but turns out, he wasn't. he called the hospital and scheduled me for the next night. i just had to wait one more night! i couldn't wait, it suddenly didn't feel real! so we began preparing for an induction the next night and i made plans for zenna to stay with her grandma may and drake got a few days off work.
the next day actually went fairly quickly because i was running errands in pocatello. in the middle of having a baby, we are in the process of buying a house and i had to take paperwork to the bank, get signatures from drake, and make sure nothing would need to be done in the next day or two while we were in the hospital. finally, drake and i dropped zenna off with her grandma and headed to the hospital.
things immediately began differently than with zenna's induction. i was dilated to a 4 and able to skip the initial medicine to get the cervix ready. i was already in the beginning stages of labor. so we just started the pitossin at 8 pm and waited. my mom and sisters came to be with me and wait it out. drake and i ordered games on the iPad and played together to pass the time. over a few hours, the medicine was increased and the contractions intensified. i began to feel them pretty good, and by 11:00 we ordered the epidural. the epidural doesn't scare or bother me. i like how it gives me the ability to relax and enjoy the labor experience. once the epidural started working, i was able to go to sleep! bailey ended up leaving, but my mom and jessica were troopers sleeping on the hospital chairs, and drake crawled into the bed with me. i got about three hours of sleep before getting restless at 2 am. i wasn't in pain, but i could feel pressure and i could feel it pretty low. i tossed and turned and watched the monitors while trying to distract myself by watching netflix on the iPad, but eventually i knew i needed checked. the pressure was pretty strong and down pretty low. just as i was waking drake to get a nurse to get checked, she walked in and checked me. sure enough i was at a 9! it was time to get the doctor on his way! it was 3 am and i woke my mom and jessica. they groggily got themselves up. i was feeling excitement. i felt no pain, only pressure, and was just ready to get my baby in my arms!
dr. cox showed up by 3:20 and it this point, the pressure was strong enough that i wanted to start pushing. i didn't want to wait anymore. this only got worse when he broke my water, by 3:30 i was pushing.
with zenna's birth, i never felt a thing besides some back labor. i never felt a thing pushing, so that's what i expected here. but once i started pushing and isla started moving, i was feeling some pain down low. i wasn't prepared for this and it hurt to push a little bit, but i was told to keep pushing through it. i remember voicing things about the hurt, but i knew the only way to get it to stop was to get isla out. so i pushed and even while dr. cox got some lidocaine to numb the parts that were hurting, i kept pushing. since i could feel the pressure and pain, my body knew what to do and when to push and within 11 minutes, isla josephine was born.
honestly, is this man not the greatest?!
Part II: first impressions
the first things i thought as the nurses pulled you onto my chest was how big you were! big hands, big feet, sturdy and solid body. you didn't want to cry at first, just whimper. and we had to coax it out of you a little bit. eventually, your lungs opened up and satisfied the nurses, but that didn't last long. you're still like that. you are the sweetest little thing and hardly ever cry! daddy and i had the name isla josephine picked out beforehand, but after seeing you, we weren't sure if that was the right fit for you. after being with you for a little while though, we kept the name, and it's a perfect fit. we just really love how beautiful the name isla is- and mommy fell more in love with it while visiting texas and seeing it written all over (although the pronunciation is different)- and later we found out that you great great great grandma on mommy's side was named ila- but josephine is a name to honor your great grandmother josephina, your daddy's grandmother. she passed away in 2012, but we know you were getting plenty of time with her before you came to us.
another thing we loved immediately was your hair and lips. your hair was even longer than big sissy's was, and just beautiful. everyone compliments it. and your lips are sublime. so big and pouty. your mouth is always hanging open from the weight of your lips, and your mommy adores it. you are beautiful. sweet-natured, beautiful, and healthy.
mommy knew you were a good-sized baby, but still a little surprised when the nurses told her you were 8 pounds and 5 ounces! you soon proved that there's a reason you were so healthy-sized. you nursed for forty minutes, it was like you didn't know when your belly was full. you're still like that. you would eat every ten minutes if mommy would let you, but then your tummy gets so full that you puke it up! and you did puke up a lot of that first feeding, but we just kept feeding you and tried to monitor it so you weren't overfilling. you followed in you sister's footsteps and were exactly 21 inches. my tiny, tall babies!
our first night together was full of interruptions. mommy's nurses kept checking on her because she was bleeding a little too much. then they gave her medicine to slow the bleeding, and that medicine made her puke. one time she was holding you when she started puking, but don't worry daddy came to the rescue pretty quickly. speaking of daddy, you are one lucky little girl. your daddy is honestly the best daddy i've ever seen. he is a kind daddy with so much love. he loved you so much before he ever saw you! he is a fun daddy. he loves playing with big sissy, and he can't wait for you to join their fun. he is a strong daddy. he definitely makes mommy and big sissy feel safe and protected. you'll never have to worry. and he is a wise daddy. sometimes mommy get stressed or overwhelmed, but daddy always remembers the big picture and reminds mommy to look at the big picture. he will set a great example of love, friendship, and righteousness for you to follow.
our night was also interrupted when the nurses came and took you to get your first check-up. you were gone for a while, so mommy got some sleep. then, when the doctors brought you back to us, you had a cute little mohawk hair-do because of how much hair you have! i was smitten with you all over again. i just couldn't believe how much love i felt for your beautiful little body. mommy and daddy love you more and more every day!
Part III: dear zenna
zenna, you just became a big sissy! we were so excited for you to get your own baby around all the time. you have always loved baby dolls and pretending to be mommy. and you have definitely loved the new experience. you haven't shown any signs of jealousy or discontent . . . yet. the first thing you want to do every morning, and several times throughout the day is "baby, kiss, baby." being the mimicry master that you are, you don't just give one smooch, but several in a row, just like you watch mommy do to you and isla. even from the first moment you met baby isla, you were thrilled and sweet. mommy has to watch you so closely because if she isn't looking, sometimes you try to pick isla up all by yourself and you're not exactly sure how to be careful and soft yet. but you're learning! you are a great big sissy! mommy has been able to manage getting you to nap on schedule, even with little sissy as a new addition. you do, however, LOVE to sneak away with pumped breast milk and drink it yourself! this has been cracking your family members up! don't worry, it's healthy for you!
while mommy was in the hospital, you spent two days with grandma may, kali, and caden. you had lots of fun, and grandma spoiled you big-time! she took you to the dollar store and filled a bucket with new toys for you to enjoy while mommy is busy nursing. you are lucky to be so loved by so many!
you also spent a night with auntie bop and uncle z. they took you to one of your favorite places: the rodeo to watch coleman rope! they also spoiled you. later, you went to a rodeo in mccammon and spent all night with papa. you love papa bear. but, while you were having so much fun visiting other people and having fun, your mommy was missing you! i was happy to get you back! mommy and daddy like having our babies close to us while we sleep at night. so we all cram into our bed together to go to sleep. we do eventually move you to your toddler bed, but then you also eventually join us in our bed again. just like with baby isla who goes back and forth from her bassinet to our bed too.
mommy has been so impressed with you and your love for sissy. i know sometimes you'll have disagreements as you two grow together, but i'll always remind you of how much you loved each other from day one!
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