teacher edition

the day finally came. a day as anticipated as my wedding and birth of zenna. seriously, that's how much i've thought about, prepared for, and daydreamed of when i'd have my own real  classroom. i was a fast track student and struggled through a rough, intense 12 weeks of summer classes so that i could have the opportunity to be a full-time teacher of my own classroom. it has always been important to me, and now it's here!

i spent hours preparing my classroom. i felt like i needed a space to feel comfortable and homey before i could settle into curriculum. and fortunately for me, creating powerpoint/publisher documents for my classroom became a stress-RELIEVER not inducer. i started creating a vision of bright neon colors and a rockstar theme to excite myself along with my future fourth graders. i really couldn't have picked a better grade, either. fourth graders come in small with innocent smiles and huge hearts, and they transform into bigger, sassier, witty pre-preteens. they don't stink yet (mostly). and they don't argue yet (mostly). but they know how to read and write and do their arithmetic (mostly). i was so eager to be part of such a transitionary stage!

Me in Fourth Grade! :)

Room 125 is finished. Check it out. 

after hours of work and simply planning layout and decorations, i finally felt at home in my classroom. i was happy with the spunky, zebra, rockstar environment and got good feedback from mentors and friends that it would be enough to impress the parents. half the battle of teachers is working with parents. especially at my school. finally, i was able to settle into some management plans and curriculum mapping. for those of you who think teachers only work 9 months of the year ... please stop the ignorance! i've never worked so hard in my life! there is a lot of pressure on teachers' that directly affects the future. my summer thoughts were consistently swirling in a whirlwind of decisions and work. also, a lot of my bank account was drained on this preparation. but the more prepared i was getting, the better i was feeling. 

we are warned that there is a scientifically proven progression of teacher's emotions during their first year. it looks like this: 

well i knew that i definitely had my head in the clouds with excitement and anticipation for the school year to start, and i was a little worried about what would happen next, but i've tried to keep my cool and simply just tried to stay on top of it all. 

but my first week of school ABSOLUTELY ROCKED. 

for me, it was amazing. i have a group of students that in general want to please me or make me happy. they are willing to work hard, they are willing to listen (in general, with a good enough incentive) and they are willing to help teach a new teacher. i have a class of more boys than girls and i love that. i have a class where writing and reading and art is cherished and sought after. my students loved my first read aloud that they begged and begged to have me keep reading chapters at a time, and finally when i cracked down on last chapter, they begged for one more sentence.  there is a high level of engagement in learning, and i know that that doesn't always happen, so i'm grateful and excited. i decided to take a little more difficult route of teaching math by using a math journal full of interactive cut-outs and glue-ins instead of just the textbook and worksheets. i truly believe in the effectiveness of hands-on, engaged learning and so i just went all out. today at our friday class meeting, i was rewarded when they agreed that it was a better way to learn. right now that might only be because it's less boring, but that's an awesome reason! anything to make math a little less hated is a beautiful thing! 

now, even though i feel very lucky for the who's-who in my class. that doesn't mean this first week was easy! everything i planned took longer/shorter than anticipated which set off a domino effect of adjustments and readjustments all day long. i think this is fairly normal in the teaching world, but it was definitely one of my main struggles. luckily, i work with two other amazing teachers who are helpful and selfless. also, my Facilitator at the school who is associated with BYU is amazing and does so much work for me to help me get started. i spent every break and extra second planning for the future lessons and just have been trying to stay afloat. fortunately again, one of my favorite parts of teaching is the planning aspect. i love making those kinds of decisions and so that work isn't too hard on me. 

i came home this weekend with a target plastic baggy full of spiral-bound notebooks so i can read journal entries all weekend, every weekend. i think that's a special way to see inside their brain and then leave a comment so they feel noticed and important. 

the big things that matter to me this year is for my students to feel loved by me, respected by me, and educated from me.

**one week later**
i survived another week! i honestly know this is where i belong because i love it! i haven't had one bad day yet where the students drove me completely insane or everything fell apart... although i'm still learning a lot and nothing is perfect. i send home homework packets every monday instead of homework each night and this week i completely spaced that it was a new week and homework needed to be ready. i remembered as the students were getting ready to leave and asked for their homework packets! yikes. i told them they had a free day and then emailed the parents to let them know not to expect homework... and i felt like an idiot. but, still, that's not the end of the world. little things here and there go wrong every day, but overall, i love my job. today i was so happy to learn that the class average for my first math test was 86%! that's a huge success in my book!
this week i've worked 12 hour days. from six in the morning to six in the evening. i have to force myself to leave because there is always work to do. planning, grading, cleaning. but then i think of zenna and can't wait to get home to her. she has the best welcome for me every single day. genuine excitement for me every single time. i love that. and i love her. now that i'm in the swing of things a little more, my goal is to be home every day by 4:30-5. one thing i'll have to do is continue getting to work at 6 or 6:30.
drake has been an amazing support too. i'm so grateful for him. he's a full-time daddy, full-time student, and somehow finds time to go to work for us too. he even does the dishes! i couldn't ask for anything better than that!
this year might be one of the hardest years we've had, but it will definitely be one of our best!